2020: New Year, New Me

2019 has not been my year. I know that to be true for quite a few people. I wasn't an exception. 2019 honestly was one of the hardest years of my life thus far. A lot of things didn't go as expected and I found myself losing confidence, being less healthy and happy, and losing motivation for a lot of things. I came back to Washington for Christmas Break and it really hit me that I wasn't very happy and I felt like I regressed in a lot of aspects of my life.

So, for 2020, I have decided this is the year to focus on improving and maintaining ME. This year I have a lot of exciting things coming up and I want to enjoy them to the fullest by being the best version of myself. In the past, I have always said I had resolutions but always quit pretty quickly or was too lazy to follow through. This year though, I am more determined than ever to do what I need to do to gain my confidence back. Confidence is such a big factor in my life and without it, I constantly feel unhappy and lonely. In 2020, I want to help myself improve and get back to where I was. I hope that this post can help you make some of your own goals and that we can help keep each other accountable. Working on your dreams together makes such a difference in the success rate. So, without further ado, here are my 2020 new years resolutions.

YouTube Channel

Probably the biggest goal I have this year is to start a YouTube Channel. I already know the amount of eye rolls I'm going to get when they find out I want to do this. No, I don't want to start one so I can become famous. I want to start one for the exact same reasons I started this blog. I want to learn more about creating content. I am going to be working with this content in the future and I need to understand how it works. I also really want to vlog my study abroad/field study in New York City. I think it would be a lot of fun and will help me keep the amazing memories! And maybe a part of me just wants to try to see what it would be like to have people watching a video of me. But so what? In 2020, I am not going to be self conscious about the things I want to do. Everyone has different interests and mine so happen to be creating content. I won't apologize for what I am passionate about. All I know is that if I don't try it out, I will regret it for a long time. So with that, I will be filming my first video when I am back in Utah in the next week or so. Be on the lookout!

Fitness/Health

This year has been a roller coaster with my fitness. I did a tap dance class and worked out every so often during the first 4 months, took a zumba class and went to a gym pretty consistently during spring, kinda crashed in summer and didn't eat much or go to the gym, and in fall I took a cycling class and ate okay food. Even though I feel like my eating habits and exercise habits fluctuated a lot, my weight literally stayed the same. Even when I was eating a lot healthier and worked out a lot. It really discouraged me that I saw no difference. In pictures or on the scale. I just don't feel healthy. For 2020, I want to focus on creating that schedule that I never had. This semester, I will literally set aside time for the gym and not just go when I have the time. I also have more time in the mornings now with my schedule to prepare a healthy breakfast. I need to do this to feel better physically, mentally, and emotionally. I like to work out. I really do, but I often feel self conscious around other people who look more fit or can do more than I can. Classic Gym-timidation. This year though, I choose not to care anymore. I want to improve myself. I need to get back to where I was where I was proud of the body I was in. I am setting a schedule of cardio and abs everyday and alternating arms, legs, and intense stretching. I also plan to take a lot of fitness classes while in New York and take advantage of a lot of "free trials" to see what kinds of workouts I like the best. I have found I really enjoy taking classes because there is a structure and someone yelling at you if you don't do it. One of my really good friends Lisa recently started a YouTube and her Instagram has a lot of fitness related content and she has motivated me a lot to get started on my own fitness journey.

Cook More

Going along with fitness, I want to cook more. Part of the reason I haven't felt healthy is because of the food I put into my body. I eat way better than during my freshman year, but I still can do better. I am slowly learning how to cook more things, but this year I want to potentially start food prepping, or at least having a cookbook that I cook from each week. I really like cooking when I have the time to do it. So this year I am going to MAKE the time. If you have any cookbooks you love DM me!

Learn More Photography Skills

This kind of goes along with my whole YouTube thing since that's video editing, but I also want to work on my photography skills. I want to have clients at some point as maybe a side hustle to other jobs. I want to finite my style and learn new things on Photoshop. I have Photoshop available to me in the school library, and I never go. I need to change that. I have so many ideas for photoshoots and I just need people to try them out with!

As Extra As Alena Blog

With this blog, I really want to focus on growing it. I want more people to read it because I actually think I can offer something. I am thinking about buying my domain as the first step. But, I also need your help! Please share my blog with anyone you think would be interested! It would really mean a lot to me. I want to be more creative in general this year which is why I am focusing on so many aspects of content creation.

Overall Confidence

My best friend from Washington, Kelly, came to visit me in Utah back in November. I also came back to Washington during this Christmas Break and we hung out. She told me that she felt as though I was more myself in Washington. At first I was kind of like "what..." but then I realized. I am comfortable in Washington. I grew up here, I know a lot of people, and it's safe. In Utah, I feel like sometimes I have to put on an act. My school is very smart and I often feel inferior, the girls are gorgeous and I just don't feel confident, and I have grown to be much more shy than I was in high school. In 2020, I want to be more myself. I don't care if people think I'm loud and obnoxious. Sometimes, I am! I want to feel free of judgement and talk to more people. 2020 is going to be the year I get my confidence and motivation back.

This was a relatively short post, but I know writing out my goals really helps. I also plan on making a 2020 mood/inspiration/motivation board. Basically I'll print out a ton of pictures of my goals and make a collage and put it where I can see it everyday.

I really hope this helped you with coming up with some of your own goals. Comment below some of your resolutions and maybe I'll add to my list! 2019 thanks for the lessons... but 2020, LET'S DO THIS!

Alena